wutuwaitn4's Xanga

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 21:27:30 GMT

The Best Compliment I've Ever Gotten

As I mentioned before, I took a week long trip to the ATL & Chicago last month. In ATL, I met up with the lovely Michinyon. She doesn't really update anymore, but she used to be pretty active on Xanga back in the good ol' days when Xanga was a bustling metropolis instead of a desert wasteland like it is now. During dinner, she told me something that brightened up my year.

M: I have a confession to tell you.
Me: you have a huge crush on me?
M: HA! no.
Me: You have a hot korean guy stashed away for me and we're going to meet him after dinner?
M: Yes, that's it. Who told you!? JK
Me: Aww don't play with my emotions like that. I'm fragile.
M: Anyway, what I wanted to tell you was that from reading your blog, you didn't seem like the type of person I would want to be friends with.
Me: Really? No one has told me that before.
M: Yea...like I didn't get why you were popular. I just didn't see what the big deal was.
Me: ok...*awkward silence*
M: BUT...now that I met you. I totally get it. =)

Then we made out for 5 minutes straight. What can I say? She knows the right words to say to get in my pants. She's a hot korean too, too bad she missing something in her crotch. *sigh*

I guess I need to put a disclaimer up on my blog.

DISCLAIMER: If you think I'm awesome now, just wait till you meet me. I'm even more awesome IRL (in real life).

Monday, November 02, 2009

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 19:33:47 GMT

Wuwu from Where the Wild Things Are

I dressed up as Max this year. All the supplies used to make this costume was brought from a craft store and my friend's mom sewed the costume for me. All the supplies ended up costing around $60. I never really cared for Halloween, until I started dressing up. Now it's becoming one of my favorite holidays! I'm already thinking about what I should be next year already. Any ideas?

Me and the Ambiguously Gay Duo, Gary & Ace. After I took the pic w/ them, the guy on the left says to me, "you're only allowed to take pics with girls for the rest of the night." Little does he know... >=)

Me and Lady Gaga on Halloween Eve. I found her roaming around the streets of Hollywood. She was slightly inebriated.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 19:52:46 GMT

Screw You 24-Hour Fitness!

I've had my 24-Hour membership for 3.5 years, but I haven't gone in 3 years. I'm paying $36 a month so that's over $1200 down the drain. I kept on telling myself I would go next week, but the weeks turned into months and the months turned into years. I finally went into the gym the other day, not to work out, but to cancel my membership.

There was an episode of Friends where Chandler tried to cancel his membership but got persuaded not to from a hot female employee. So Ross goes down to the gym to help him out, but he ended up getting a gym membership of his own, from that same hot female employee. While this might be a slight exageration, gyms are known to be very persuasive, and they do hire hot people.

While I was sitting, waiting for the Membership Manager, I kept thinking to myself...don't be a hot korean, don't be a hot korean, don't be a hot korean, I should've masturbated before I came here, don't be a hot korean.

After waiting for about 5 minutes, the manager was finally ready to see me. The second I saw his face, I knew I was fucked (and not in a good way). Mr. David Choi was so hot. When he shook my hands with this firm but gentle grip, I almost jizzed in my panties. He looked like a hybrid between Daniel Henney and Wentworth Miller. *swoons*

David: Hey Mr. ____, can I call you John?
Me: *thinks to myself: you can call me whatever you like baby* Yea
David: Why do you want to cancel your membership? We have many...

I'm not exactly sure what he said after that. I just started daydreaming about us getting all hot and sweaty from working out and then going to the locker room to take a shower. When I snapped back into reality, not only did I not cancel my membership, I had sign up for a personal trainer. FML!

So screw you 24-hour fitness....for hiring such hot people to steal our money!

Friday, October 09, 2009

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 16:14:19 GMT

Do Not Attempt to Outhomo Me

I can and will always take it to the next level baby.

Why do straight guys even try? Amateurs.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 17:37:42 GMT

Yosho Wants to Take it Up the Ass...

by a 350lb black guy. I always sensed with my 99.99% accurate gaydar that he might be mildly homo, but not this homo. He wrote an entry that asked all his readers to ask him a question. Someone asked (not me):

"Q: if you were sent to prison and a big, butch, 350 pound black dude gave you the option of taking it in the ass or tossing his salad, which would you choose?"

His response:

"I'd probably take it in the ass, at least the action itself is more or less out of my control as opposed to salad tossing which is... well... horrifying. (unless you're Wuwu)"

I love how Yosho always mentions me whenever he talks about anything homo-related. I feel special. <3333

Let's analyze his answer. So given two options, both of which I presume he doesn't find pleasurable, he picks taking it up the ass. Now I'm not straight (obviously), but if I were, I would definitely choose tossing his salad. Isn't this the obvious choice? Or am I missing something? Allow me to elaborate.

black guy - average penis size 8"
350 lb black guy - 8" + 2" (1"+ for every 50lbs after 250bs) = 10"

So he'd rather take it up the ass from someone with a 10", possibly even bigger, penis instead of something painless like tossing salad? Yes, it's gross but it's painless. Given the option of licking an asshole or getting my asshole tore up from the floor up, i choose licking an asshole. And imagine the girth on that monster cock. Penis sizes are usually proportional to a guy's body type. The only plausible explanation I can think of is...Yosho likes it up the ass.

Still not convinced of his homo tendencies? Let me remind you with these pics. Keep in mind that Yosho was not inebriated.

Yes, I'm very bitter and maybe jealous that I got outhomo'd by three straight guys.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 19:02:20 GMT

I Won BIG in Vegas

Last weekend, I took a much needed vacation in Vegas. Although I lost like $300, I still won big.

I think this is worth more than $300, don't you? So technically, I'm up. I won this at Circus Circus, at the "Toss a Quarter Into the Dish" game. You know it's one of those impossible games because it only takes one quarter to win a bigass prize. Somehow, I managed to get a quarter on the dish on the VERY FIRST TOSS! HELLZ YEAH! So of course, I went and bought the lottery that night. Seeing as I'm still updating my xanga, you can guess that I didn't win the jackpot. I guess I only have luck getting giant bananas.

Winning BIG wasn't the highlight of my trip. Thunder Down Under was! NDM was nice enough to give me his extra tickets. He has the season pass or something, and had free tickets. Thanks man!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 20:31:03 GMT

Weekly Prostate Exams FTH (For the health)

I read a very disturbing statistic from wherethefishlives' pulse.

"According to WebMD, 80 percent of men who reach age 80 have prostate cancer. WTF? I didn't know it was that high."

I just had a health screening at my work last week, and according to the nurse I'm in "perfect health." All my cholesterol levels, blood pressure, etc. are at perfect levels. That means that there's a great chance that I will live pass 80. Shit, I don't want prostate cancer, or any cancer for that matter. But if I had a choice of what cancer to get, I definitely wouldn't want it to be in my prostate of all places.

To prevent myself from getting prostate cancer, I'll going to start getting weekly prostate exams. Yes, you heard right, weekly. As much as I hate HATE having a finger probing around up my ass, I'm willing to sacrifice my level of discomfort to be prostate cancer free. In fact, I think I should start a club, kinda like a book club, but for prostate cancer. A bunch of guys getting together to hang out, eat, and give each other prostate exams. Don't worry, I'll make sure we eat before the exams start. We don't want no butterfingers up in this club.

Will you join my prostate cancer movement? RSVP today!

Speaking of ass, I wish I could do this. I posted this on Facebook and ibizajb said "I bet you can do this...with a desktop." He's so mean to me. =(

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Thu, 06 Aug 2009 04:07:38 GMT

I'm Not Dead

It's been a minute since I've blogged. Typing an entry feels so strange now. Xanga is starting to become like a long lost friend, so familiar yet distant at the same time. I guess there's only so many entries I can write about masturbating, pooping and gay p0rn. But no matter what, whether I update much anymore or not, I know for a fact that I would never quit Xanga. It's been a part of my life for too long. I've met too many cool people on here.

From now on, I'll mostly just be posting photos, photos from the past 2 years that I have yet to post. I know, I know. I've said on several occasions that I would post them but still haven't. But this time, I'm really a changed man. I just got back from my Seattle / Vancouver trip 3 days ago and ALL THE PICS ARE EDITED AND POSTED! WOW! This is a huge accomplishment for me. I posted them on Facebook, but not on Xanga yet. I will soon, probably tomorrow. Don't worry, I'll try to throw in a poop entry in between all the photos.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 21:29:03 GMT

Punishable by Death

I was enjoying myself the other night, masturbating to some good ol' American gay porn, when I see a moving shadow from the corner of my eye. I look to my left and see a giant daddy long leg crawling across my wall. I'm not afraid of spiders, nor do I hate them, but I don't like the idea of one living in my bedroom. At first, I was just going to ignore him, but then I got creeped out because he was totally staring at my cock. That perv! His eight beady eyes glued on my chinese sausage. Besides, he who interrupts me during my precious alone time, does not deserve to live. So I took a little break from my hand exercise to dispose of the intruder.

I already had some toilet paper prepared (for my splooge). As I inched closer and closer to him, he went behind my computer and hid under some wires. "You can run, but you can't hide!", I thought to myself. Well, apparently, I was wrong. He can hide, and very well I may add. I spent the next 10 minutes looking for him and could not find him. I was still naked with a humongous boner, down on all fours looking for a damn spider.

I decided to dim the lights, to trick him into thinking it's safe to come out. While I waited for him, I decided to resume my previous activity. No use waiting and wasting time doing nothing. A minute turns into five, then fifteen, and still no sign of the spider. Where the fuck did he go? Did he teleport out of my room? At this point, I didn't even care about busting a nut anymore, I was more set on finding him and killing him for ruining my night.

Just when I was about to give up and go to bed, he crawls out from god knows where and I see him on the wall. I grabbed the toilet paper and killed him with the quickness. AH HA! Who knew you could get more pleasure from killing a spider than having an orgasm?

When an Earthquake Hits

Mon, 18 May 2009 19:51:07 GMT

When an Earthquake Hits...

...go under a desk or stand under a door frame. NOT! That is so 2008. Now, the first thing to do after an earthquake, or any emergency for that matter, is to update your Facebook/Twitter. Last night, there was a 4.7 earthquake here in Southern California and instantly, my Facebook/Twitter was flooded with "AHHH!! EARTHQUAKE!", "OMG EARTHQUAKE!", or some variant of it.

It's crazy how attached we are to social networking. Speaking as a supporter and proponent of the Web 2.0 movement, I don't know why I'm so addicted. I've always been interested in reading people's statues. Even before FB/Twitter, I would always check the away messages and profiles of my AIM buddies. Maybe I'm just that nosey? Or maybe I'm just that bored all the time? Who knows. I know I'm not the only one, seeing how popular social networking is nowadays. You can really gauge how widespread a technology is people in their late 50's (like my dad), who is not very tech savvy, has a FB.

Some people say this overuse of technology and social networking has caused people to be less social and impersonal. I strongly disagree. They are nothing more but another tool for us to socialize. There will always be newer technologies coming out that facilitates and revolutionizes the way we interact and socialize...from the telegraph, to snail mail, to the cell phone, to social networking, it'll never stop. And frankly, I'm more than excited to see what the next thing is.

P.S. I'm disappointed in myself for not being the first person to update about the earthquake on my FB/Twitter list. Three people beat me to it. I must be quicker next time.

P.S.S. I'm not a loser that's on FB/Twitter 24/7 waiting for a earthquake to hit so I can update about it. I just happened to be on my computer and on FB when the earthquake hit. What are the odds!?